The Trump Whisperer Puts In Overtime This Week

It was an interesting week for the Trump Whisperer.  

I not only had to step up to explain a few curveballs from Big Orange, but who also found himself running interference for about a dozen of his Cabinet level teammates who participated in the text message heard round the world - an informational update on an attack plan they all knew was assembled, but not yet executed. 

That darn text! 

No bones about this one - major, major screw up! It was a colossal mistake, hideous lack of oversight, and clearly the act of someone not paying attention to what they were doing. 

And that is it. 

There was no need to lie about who was responsible, which many did. There were a lot of lies and even more wild speculation about improper apps downloaded on government phones, which never happened. The claim that personal cell phones were in use for official business, and that was the crux of what caused the problem, was yet another lie. 

The missile strike itself went off without a flaw, but the text message ABOUT the strike, well, poop meets fan. 

No doubt mission objectives were met. The day was won and a whole bunch of Iranian-funded Houthis terrorists were turned into crispy bits that will fertilize the Yemeni desert floor for months to come.  

But that text. 

So, in addition to the people you know named Hegseth and Gabbard and Rubio and Waltz, there were others included in the text thread as well. One of them is administration official Jamieson Greer - or at least he was supposed to be. Instead of Greer, we have been told an administrative aide of National Security Advisor Mike Waltz erroneously entered the cell number of Jeffrey Goldberg. Both Greer and Goldberg were listed in the phone’s directory shorthand as JG. 

Whoopsie. 

Goldberg is not an administration official. He is, in fact, the Editor-in-Chief at The Atlantic, a decidedly left-of-center publication known for its animosity toward all things Trump. 

The magazine doesn't like his policies, his personality, or his posture. If Trump had a dog, The Atlantic would kick it. Goldberg wrote a book last year called "On Heroism: McCain, Milley, Mattis, and the Cowardice of Donald Trump." You get the picture. 

Knowing all this, what are the chances the biggest security gaffe in recent history would fall directly in the lap of none other than The Atlantic's own JG?  

Don't say strange things like this can't happen. Remember when the very married (at the time) Joe Mullins apparently started "sparking" a Twin Peaks waitress, young enough to be his daughter? It happened just days after his embarrassing 2015 defeat in the local state legislative election. He made all kinds of unprompted nefarious offers for her to join him on a trip or send him a picture of herself in the shower. Nasty stuff - and it had gone on for days. The Metro Spirit published a cover story, and included verbatim quotes from a phone call between Joe and the girl while Spirit staffers Joe White, Stacey Eidson and yours truly listened in. Yep, that was Joe. No doubt about it. We all knew his phone number. 

Bear in mind, I had worn him out on the air and in print all during that election season for any number of scumbag moves, business embarrassments, and slumlord tendencies. In my opinion, and in the opinions of many who have known him, he is a terrible human being that is unfit for any position of public trust. 

So how did the story of his ill-advised and illicit pursuit of Maddie Rogers fall into our laps?  

He picked the wrong girl. 

Maddie's childhood friend and occasional roommate happens to be my daughter, Christine.  

Joe was even dumber - and more unlucky - than we thought. 

PLOP - right in our collective lap. 

Back to our current coverage of super lucky ducks and the unlucky schmucks on the other end of the stick. We proudly present JG and the Trump team. 

The main difference in the two comparative tales, JG (Goldberg) supposedly benefited from pure luck and the slip of a finger. It appears the Trump team were simply innocent victims. There was no innocent victim in the Mullins situation, just a dirty old man doing what slimy dirty old men do. 

Morale of the story: Crazy coincidences can and do happen.  

Not surprisingly, when they do, every conspiracy theorist in the Western Hemisphere has a nefarious explanation that must be the truth behind all that transpired. 

Here is what the Trump Whisperer believes: We have unconventional leaders with unconventional ideas enthusiastically entering every level of the Executive Branch hierarchy. That means we are going see and hear some real weirdness go down. But unless there is either death or graft on obvious display, those of us on the Right do not care. For the last four years we have witnessed the Left get away with theft, bribery, perjury, con artistry, and enough woke broken thinking to make Maude Findley cry. Trump and his team have better ideas and zero patience for those who choose not to put America first. No more. 

We may wince occasionally, have some short term growing pains, and perhaps even irritate a few allies - I mean, continue irritating a few allies. But Trump is determined to put us back on the road we were so happy to be on in 2020 - right up until the Wuhan Flu canceled the party. 

But Big Orange is back baby., The Arab neighbors of Gaza are feverishly working for peace and resolution for all with Israel. Russia and Ukraine are closer to peace than they have been since the war broke out two years ago. The price of eggs and gasoline continue to fall with each passing week. 

Things are looking up, and it is still just March!